Thomas Paine

I promised much more than this but here are a few scraps:

To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead.

The real man smiles in trouble, gathers strength from distress, and grows brave by reflection.

Friday's Marmaduke

Marmaduke is dead.

Thursday's Marmaduke

Marmaduke has escalated his sexual harrassment. His owner-lady is understandably nervous because he's FUCKING HUGE.

Wednesday's Marmaduke

Marmaduke's owner-man is still on acid; that's why his face is so fucked up. Meanwhile, "Marm" insists on non-consensual oral sex with a stranger.

basketcase is funny

Everyone patronize the website.

Monday's Marmaduke

Marmaduke's ignorance of traffic law is supposed to amuse us. His face is disfigured because:

A. He spent too much time with his head out the window.

B. He has developed tragic facial tumors.

C. His owner-man is on acid.

D. Brad Anderson is a tired old man.

You decide. Post any further suggestions in the comments section.

Fort Irwin, CA

This is the view from my balcony:

Tehachapi, CA

Here are some pictures from my mother-in-law's house:

Those are California Poppies, the state flower. Here's some of the mountains:

Coming This Week..

I'm back. And here's what I plan to do this week:

1) Joe Mathlete is taking the week off, so I will explain Marmaduke for him. He didn't mind when I did it last time.

2) I have new and old pictures of California to post.

3) I want to write a short article on Thomas Paine and his relevancy in the 21st Century. Although I realise that he didn't have any original ideas, he put democracy in layman's terms.

4) Of course, there will be more pictures of cute animals.

Palindromes

Palindromes were a hobby of mine for a while. If you think about them for enough hours, your brain will start to automatically invert every word you see, hear, or think, searching for possibilities. I wrote this one:

Daria had a fad, a hair ad.

Sometimes they don't make perfect sense, but if all the words are real words, it counts. Another one of mine:

Aero-Kevin made Dave's eyes evade. Damn! I've Korea.

The best palindrome ever written was by Gordon Dow. It's a whole page, and it has moments of eerie profundity. It even seems to almost make narrative sense. I present to you: Dog Sees Ada

Now I've found the perfect marriage of hobbies. Webcomics and Palindromes come together in my latest discovery, Palindramas.

This is so stupid it defies any explanation. Owner-Lady appears to have become a catatonic, gravity-defying, psychedelic-pants-wearing mannequin with giant feet who is pointing at something that only she can see.

Marmaduke's owner-lady is taunting him while presenting her backside, in the hope that his inevitable rage will provoke him to forcibly mount her.

Marmaduke continues to inconvenience his Owner-People. They continue to let him.

FaceBook is MySpace for Grown-Ups

I encourage everyone to join me there, and add me as a friend. I am Patrick Reading in the Atlanta, GA network. Seriously, do it now!

The 100-Year Bloom

When I first arrived in the Mojave Desert, it was late September 2004 and it was HOT. And DRY. The landscape looked like I had moved to Mars. The wind blew at hurricane-force, but felt like a hairdryer.

By November, the hot wind had turned cold. Really cold. It snowed before Thanksgiving that year. Then it started raining every day for the rest of the winter. I didn't know it at the time, but this was a once-in-a-lifetime event. I just bitched about being cold and wet.

Unbeknownst to me, this record-breaking rainfall was setting the stage for the most amazing Spring in living memory for the Mojave. The landscape, normally scrub-brush clinging to rocks and dust, turned green! As it was happening, I though it was normal: doesn't everywhere turn green in the Spring? No. To make a long story short: I saw vast valleys that appeared yellow because of tiny tiny flowers at the top of the little thin stalks that came out of nowhere. I saw flocks of butterflies swimming through the air in an oddly organized cyclonic pattern. All through this I assumed that it was the wonder of a normal Spring in the desert.

Towards the end, my aunt emailed me to ask about the desert flowers. It seems she had seen a news article about how plants were blooming in Death Valley (right next-door to me). Some of these plants only bloom about once every 100 years, and this was the rare occasion. I had enjoyed the event without even knowing how lucky I was to see it. At least I got this picture:

Now I know better. After 3 years, I realise that the Mojave won't bloom like that again anytime soon. It has only rained once (or twice?) this year, but only for a few minutes. nothing like the floods of early '05. This is officially a drought. The tree in my front yard, which only exists because of a constant sprinkler-system, dropped all it's leaves in mid-June. I guess the sprinkler couldn't counteract the dry 118' air. It's possible that this tree, which took 30 years of special treatment to grow here, won't make it through the Winter. How can it, if it misses a whole year of photosynthesis?

Forget about the drought: the desert-life out here always bounces back. At least I got to see the biggest bounce of the century.

OK

No more more late-night, half-drunk, rambling rants. Next I'll be telling you who I think killed JFK. Believe me, you would think I was crazy or retarded or both.



So, here is a picture of a cute puppy:

SMBC is funny

I'm all up in the Evil Empire.

Why do the only pictures I have of me with famous people involve unpopular politicians? Coming next week: photos of my picnic with Josef Stalin.

Me with the President

It's always fun to have lunch with the current President of the United States, whether you like him or not. In his speech, he made a joke about the food, which is standard when speaking to soldiers, but it was a little inappropriate since the foodservice people were standing right there. I hope none of them took it personally. I'm the goofy-looking guy in the upper-right corner.

Joe Mathlete is my Hero

If he's not too good for GoogleAds, then neither am I. Pickles.

Hello

Greetings, people of Earth:

The title of this blog is an anagram for my first and last names. Anagrams are fun, espescially if you get let software generate it for you. My email is also an anagram, and although Edgar Nip may look funny, it was either that or Raping Bed.